Thursday, May 30, 2013

The Decision








April 19, 2013 is a pivotal date for me. That's the day that I officially decided that I had enough of beauty salons and all the drama that comes with them, including putting creamy crack, aka harmful chemicals called relaxers in my hair. My disgust with my beautician of 8 years on that day helped me make a firm decision to go natural, a decision I had been pondering for at least 3 or 4 years. I had already damaged my hair by curling it constantly with the curling or flat irons at the crown of my head, so the only answer for that was to chop it all off and start from scratch. I've always loved having short hair so that was an easy decision to make. But the short hair also made it easier for me to begin the transitioning process, so  here I am today.

To date I have not had a relaxer since April 6, 2013. Today is Thursday May 30th. I have a small fro going on with a small amount of relaxer on the ends. I will post pictures of my progress. I'm full of excitement, questions, and I'm open to any and all suggestions from my fellow natural sistas. I've been watching YouTube videos and getting inspiration from Pinterest and pinning hair styles and healthy DIY hair products. I haven't been chemically free since I was 15, so I'm excited to see my natural hair in all it's glory again. I have no delusions that this journey will be easy, that I won't have days where I want to give up and make an appointment at the new salon I found before I decided to go natural and get the creamy crack again. I know there will be days when I look at myself in the mirror and wonder why did I do this to myself. Despite all of that there's a huge part of me that is very determined to see this through all the ups and downs, the highs and lows. Deep down I know this is the best thing I can do for the health of my hair and scalp. More than anything, I want to set the example for my two girls.

Last year I made the horrible decision to give my girls kiddie relaxers. They looked beautiful for the first few months and then the breakage started. The breakage actually started with my youngest daughter almost immediately. She was 9 and my oldest daughter was 11 when I gave them the relaxers. When I saw the extent of the breakage I stopped giving them the relaxers and began the transitioning process for them. They haven't had a relaxer in almost 6 months. I keep their hair braided and moisturized and it's been growing back just fine. My oldest daughter told me when she had her relaxer that she missed the poofiness of her hair, her natural curls. That made me feel even worse. Here this child is recognizing the beauty of her natural hair and all I was thinking about was how the girls having a relaxer would make my life easier as far as taking care of their hair. That wasn't true at all. My girl's hair was sooo much healthier and beautiful without them, and putting chemicals in their hair will always be my biggest regret when it comes to them.The good thing is we are all in this transitioning journey together as mother and daughters.


8 comments:

  1. I won't pretend to know about a black woman's hair, but I have what I call "semi-ethnic hair" ;): My mother is Mexican and my father is Polish, so you can just imagine the blends of texture I have going on. Personally, I've always thought natural hair looks awesome. I'm always envious of the curl and volume. I have some of each ... but not enough. ;)

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    1. Thank you so much for your feedback Velia!! Do share your hair stories and issues, I'd love to hear them. The more we share and talk about them the more we all can learn, relate, or simply sympathize. It's just sad that it took these many years to appreciate my natural hair. Having my hair chemically relaxed served it's purpose in many ways, but the whole time I did it I knew it wasn't really good for my hair or scalp. The things we do for straight, long hair, or for what is considered "Beautiful." :(

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  2. Awesome! See if you can find someone locally who makes all-natural hair products. I use Nakia Amour (made in Little Rock by Nakia Smith-Dedner herself) and I make what the girls use. If you can't find anything made locally, Beautiful Curls and Kinky Curly are good ones that I like. The hair Jehovah gave you is the most beautiful hair for you, treat it as a gift because it is. :)

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  3. Thank you for the feedback rosebud! I will definitely look into that. I'm also very interested in making some of my own hair moisturizers and deep conditioners, but I'm not opposed to trying other products either. I'm not a product junkie, but I think this new adventure could turn me into one, lol!!

    You are so right - the hair Jehovah has given us is BEAUTIFUL, but it'll be even more so in the new world!!

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  4. Nice Article Sonya! But you know me: Shame on you for giving the girls a relaxer!!! I'm glad you let it grow out! :) Lots of good recipes online for healthy hair products.

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    1. Hello my Michea!!!! Thanks for reading and responding!!! I know, giving them relaxers is the BIGGEST mistake I've made. Never again, and the good thing is they didn't like it and don't want them again either. What are some of your go to products? Do you make your own moisturizers at all??

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  5. I make my own! I love Pantene's brown bottle for moisturizing -the conditioner of course! and Neutrogena also makes a good moisturizing condition that I use. My fave of all fave "shampoo" is the Terressentials Left Coast Lemon, check it out! And if you wanna try some out, before you by, stop on by.

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  6. AWESOME!!! Where can you buy Terressentials Left Coast Lemon? Is this what you make?? Inbox me or text if you don't want to post here......

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